The story of how fishing trips to extraneous women end in fishing.
Yasha Kokinakov was a fond and frivolous person. He loved his wife, but did not miss the chance to change her, calling it a man’s inner need. Wife Yasha suspected, but could not catch on a crime. Otherwise, it would hardly have done without self-harm, the woman she was large and decisive. And Yasha was very fond of fishing. In winter and summer, he spent a lot of free time in water. He rarely returned home without a catch. What, what, but he knew how to fish.
On that ill-fated day off in the morning, everything went very well. Relatives took his wife and daughter to the village to visit. And a crazy thought flashed through him that it would be nice in such a situation to go fishing with an overnight stay to invite his acquaintance Lyudochka, a girl who is free and completely without complexes. No sooner said than done. Phoned. And early in the morning, taking his passion along the road, he took her to a familiar, uninhabited place on the banks of a quiet forest river. He set up a tent, threw up the donkeys, spread out a self-assembled tablecloth. As expected, drank - ate. And climbed into the tent, because the young also want fun.
Lyuda loved long preludes and did not immediately let herself in. They kindly were kind when the bell rang on the donka. Yasha darted out of the tent and, after a little time, returned with a good bream. He showed the fish to his girlfriend, who was not very happy, took the bream to the river and put him in a cage.
He washed his hands from fish mucus, but they still smelled bad. Pulling his cologne out of his backpack, he rubbed his palms and ducked into the tent, where his companion was impatiently waiting for him. She was not very happy with his absence, but this time was more accommodating. Everything about them began to turn out well, a young business. But the foul bell on the donka rang again, and Yasha again darted from the tent to the riverbank, leaving a perplexed lady with eyes square with amazement.
Kokinakov caught another bream. He showed him to the short-haired damsel and carried him to a cage. And then he returned to her to continue affection. And I forgot to wash my hands, wiping them warmly on my pants.
“My dear, ” the partner said displeasedly, “you would have at least washed yourself with something, dragging you from you like from a market merchant.” Maybe your wife is used to such treatment, but I’m an honest girl, I don’t like vulgarity.
Yasha scampered out of the tent, washed his hands, perfumed himself with cologne, and returned to the woman. Apparently, she was no longer close to proximity, but he tenderly and stubbornly pursued his own. And she gave up. Stormy affection was interrupted by the ringing of a bell. What mother gave birth to, Yasha automatically rushed back to the Donks. Passion for fishing unexpectedly defeated animal passion. He caught another scammer, but did not show the catch. A gloomy man with fishing rods accidentally appeared on the shore, twisting his mouth, asked:
- Nudists or what? And they already made their way here. ”He spat at his feet and went along the path down the river.
“A fool, ” Yasha shouted after, and slapping himself on the ass, killed a mosquito.
Returning to the tent, he found dressed Lyudochka with a wry face from anger.
“Let's go home, idiot, ” she did not hit him hard on the cheek with her palm, “contacted the madman on her head. Get ready, fucking angler.
Quickly packed up and loaded into the car, drove back to the city. Fishing overnight did not work.
But Yasha’s troubles did not end there. On the way, he in every possible way flattered his companion, seeking her location. The female heart quickly thaws. I persuaded her that, having arrived in the city, they would put the car in the garage and go to visit him at home. There is no wife anyway. On the way, they say, we’ll buy any yummy, we’ll take champagne. Since fishing did not work, it’s nice to meet a woman even though. Entering the garage, Kokinakov saw his wife. She also noticed him and headed towards the garage. Having quickly parked the car, Yasha whispered to Ludochka that his wife was on the horizon and she needed to be in the garage, and he was conducting a missus and would return. Throwing a backpack over his shoulder and closing the garage, Yasha grabbed his wife by the arm and led him in the direction of the house, explaining his early return from fishing by the lack of bite.
The wife and daughter also returned prematurely, because Uncle Borya washed down in the village and was not happy with the guests.
Having escorted his wife home, Yasha put his not heavy backpack in her hands, saying that he would go away for a while to buy bread. On the way to the garage I met two friends with whom I dropped into the wineglass for a moment. He told them his story about fishing, they laughed. We drank one hundred square meters, then another, another ... Well, you probably know how it happens. I went one by one. In general, he forgot about Lyudochka and fishing. In the evening, friends brought him tired home and handed over to his wife. Woke up early in the morning from a phone call. Taking a mobile phone, he went from the bedroom to another room. The neighbor called. He said that someone screaming terribly in Yasha’s garage and people were already starting to gather.
Hurryingly dressed, our hero scooted headlong into the garage. He opened the door and could not calm the tear-mad, furious woman who rushed at him with a hammer in her hand. She did not listen to him, sobbing ran away.
After spending the night in the garage, the lover found and ate a sprat paste spread in the glove compartment, drank water from the washbasin and used a viewing hole instead of a night pot. She hammered all the windows in the car and crushed the hood. By morning, she began to cry and scream loudly. She beat the iron doors with the notorious hammer, trying to free herself from captivity.
In general, the fishing was fun. Yasha now does not know what to lie to his wife about a disheveled car. But there is no question of making peace with Lyudochka. She will not forgive.